This poem was written for a friend of mine who barely survived an accident with a drunk driver. It was presented to her on Easter Sunday, April the 8th, which was the 5th anniversary of the new life she was given. It will be read at a M.A.D.D. (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) event in Denver at the end of April, 2012.
I was only driving into work
To take care of my kids
When you made a choice to take from me
Nearly all I had to give.
Not only were you very drunk
But should not be here at all
An illegal man from Mexico
Put behind our prison walls.
You tore my body almost in half
My ribs were in my lungs
My left arm and shoulder were torn away
My right leg and foot just hung.
They pronounced me dead at 3:04 am
On Sunday, April the eight
And told my friends to bring my kids
For they feared it was too late.
But then the Police Chief called to them
To tell them I had life
And to bring the kids down anyway
For I may not live past night.
My surgery ten hours long
Was only to sustain
Until the doctor could figure out
How to make me whole again.
Courtney cried and when her tears
Fell down onto my arm
They say that tears came from my eyes
Making death a false alarm.
That beautiful angel stayed by me
Refusing to take a break
She held my hand and talked to me
Saying I smiled, but would not wake.
Many could not come to me
For I was broken to the eye
They could not handle the way I looked
Without breaking down to cry.
Due to my state of comatose
They had to sell our home
The kids were staying with my friend Dave
To keep things close to norm.
My sleep it lasted two months long
Until my eyes would open
And because my name’s Hispanic nature
They assumed that’s what I’d spoken.
Interpreters and Spanish forms
Down my throat were thrust
Five languages I’d spoke before
It simply was unjust.
After twenty-eight long surgeries
And over thirty broken bones
Adding metal to my knees and hips
And my legs before they’re sown.
The doctor came to me in June
And said, “Because you’re paralyzed
We’re moving you to a nursing home,”
And I was mortified.
I begged him keep me a little more
To give me one more chance
He said I’d have to walk away
And cook if I had a chance.
I begged he pull these tubes from me
For how I breathed and I was fed
And the filter pulled from within my heart
For I watched it from the bed.
I had to learn to dress again
To speak and then to eat
For you traumatized my brain so much
That it nearly chose defeat.
I worked out in the gym as much
As they would take me there
For I had to get home to my kids
To lighten their despair.
My eyes had gone in different ways
And it caused me to see double
It would get my scrambled brain confused
And cause all kinds of trouble.
By July’s end I prepared a meal
For the staff upon my floor
To prove that I could feed myself,
My kids and many more.
And then to all of their surprise
With a walker I was driven
And walked myself right out the door
Into the new life I was given.
Dealing with brain injury
Is never an easy chore
For Brandon took it harder than most
Because of what we’d had before.
He’s tried so hard to talk with me
But the words no longer there
Some days it’s hard to even speak
And to him it is not fair.
One day he bought a book for me
“To the one my virtue instilled
The power of knowledge inside of me
Will come back if it is willed.”
“You are all that holds you back!”
Is what he wrote to me
Just as I had said to him
For all of eternity.
As Courtney would always say
The hardest part in getting through
Was when they’d say, “I understand,
I know what you’re going through.”
She knew they didn’t really know
Or even understand
Like when she’d say, “My mom can do it!”
Then they’d laugh and pat her hand.
Now the toughest job for me to do
Is providing for my kids
This highly educated college girl
Suddenly hit the skids.
The one thing drunks don’t realize
Is how much they affect
The lives of those connected to
The ones that they impact.
I pulled myself out of this grave
To come home to my kids
I’m here and not about to leave
Begging God forbid!
All I ask of those who drink
Is to be responsible
And to think of all that you can take
By acting such a fool.
~Pamela K. Pfertsh
April 8, 2012
©April 10, 2012
Rosemary, Pam, you are both so amazing
Thank you for you!!!!! Pam you are great!!!
Rosemary you are amazing
Thank you Todd. This has been the most incredibly hard thing I have had to do. Pam is amazing and put together some of my thoughts in an incredible way.
I love this poem! Many things have to change regarding victims of DUI’s and illegals that cause those accidents. The strength in me comes from the incredible LOVE that I have for my children and I was not ready to give up. Contact your legislators, state reps, congressmen. For those who can no longer speak, we must not forget. We must not forget to represent the victims and families of victims.
This is beautifu Paml! What a remarkable woman, Rosemary you are an insperation to me!
Thanks for the nice words Dee.
I was feeling kind of down today. I have been in so much pain these past few days, it feels as if I can hardly breathe. I had to come to this poem to read where I came from and where I am today.
God bless you, Rosemary!! You are always in my thoughts and prayers, but I will pray more now for less pain. Please know we love you and are here should you need anything!
God Bless,
Pam
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